June Gloom

“What’s your favorite thing about the month of June?”

That was the journal question I posed to my students at the beginning of the month.  Now, as I read their journals, their answers are almost unanimous:

No more school.

No more homework.

No more early mornings.

I can go out with my friends.

I can travel with my family.

The funny thing is, I’m fairly certain the answers would be the same if I asked my co-workers.  June is the light at the end of the tunnel.  June is the promised land.  June is the finish line.  

June gives us all a respite, a chance to catch our breath, do all the things we haven’t done while in school.  I may be on the other side of the desk, but the rules are the same for me as they are for my students.  During the school year, I’m restricted by an earlier bedtime (ideally) and an earlier wake up time.  I’m bound to certain deadlines and assignments (many of which I don’t want to do).  

10 years.  That’s how long I’m teaching.  I’ve been teaching the same amount of time my fourth-grade students have been alive.  When discussing careers, they ask me if I wanted to be a teacher when I was a kid.  The answer is an emphatic “no.”  I couldn’t imagine why I would want to be involved with school any more than was absolutely necessary.  School was exhausting and stressful for someone like me - someone who always had to earn the "A", someone who always had to get a perfect paper, someone who had to excel academically.  That was what I had.  I wasn’t the athletic girl.  I wasn’t the pretty girl.  I would try to be the smart girl.

School is still exhausting and stressful for someone like me, someone who strives to teach beyond the textbook.  

I love my students.  But after 175 days together, I’m ready for a break.  Ready not to hear “Mrs. Kennar, I need.../ I want.../ I have to.../ Will you.../ Why didn’t you.../ Why did you...”

I’ll be Mrs. Kennar until June 24th.  After that, I can just be Wendy.