About Me:

Aloha! I'm Wendy Kennar. I'm the mother of a seven-year-old son and a wife living in Los Angeles. I was a public school teacher for twelve years until a chronic medical condition made it necessary to leave my teaching career.

I've always been described as "quiet" - really, I'm just biting my tongue. I've got lots to say, and lots of thoughts to share, I just prefer to write them. That's the purpose of this blog. Each Wednesday, I post a personal essay offering my observations and thoughts.

A few fun facts about me: I've wanted to be a writer since second grade, when my teacher, Mrs. Jones, made me a "book" with a yellow construction paper cover. I have never learned to whistle, have always preferred sunflowers to roses, and have spent my life living within the same zip code.

Through the years, my writing has been published in the Los Angeles Times, Christian Science Monitor, United Teacher, GreenPrints, L.A. Parent, DivineCaroline.com, RoleReboot.org, XOJane, and Brain, Child Magazine. Additionally, my personal essays have been included in several anthologies, including: The Barefoot Review, Beyond the Diaper Bag, Lessons From My Parents, Write for Light, Being a Grown-Up: A User's Manual for the Real World, Ka-Pow!, How Writing Can Get You Through Tough Times, Breath and Shadow, The Grey Wolfe Storybook, and Sisters Born, Sisters Found.
I am a regular contributor at MomsLA.com, and you can also find me at Goodreads.

Thanks for stopping by and reading my blog. Feel free to comment and share my blog with others!

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Please Yourself

   I consider myself a fairly intelligent person.  I study hard, read a lot, am curious about the world, and retain a lot of information.  But when it comes to myself, I’m not always so bright.  I’m rather stubborn, somewhat naive, and fairly self-reliant.  And while all those qualities can be good to some extent, together those qualities make my life harder than it needs to be.
   I found another horoscope in the Sunday Los Angeles Times that may as well have been circled in red, with a great big  “Wendy, Read This!!!” written on top of it.
“Please yourself.  Life will get much simpler, and you’ll have a blast catering to your own needs.”
   Undoubtedly, I need to please myself.  More often.  I pride myself on being the best mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend, teacher, I can be.  Admittedly, I’m not always the best “Wendy” I could be.  I’ve got so many other roles to play, so many obligations and responsibilities, that taking time for myself finds its way to the bottom of my daily to-do-list and it doesn’t get done.  Or, I short-change myself, put off the bubble bath or the reading time for another day, promising myself I’ll do it, and then I don’t.
   Would I have fun catering to my own needs?  Maybe.  Maybe I would enjoy taking myself out to buy myself flowers each week.  Years ago, I would periodically purchase flowers.  Finances were limited, and I couldn’t justify spending money on something that would not last beyond a week.  I promised myself that when our financial situation improved, I would buy myself flowers every week.  And I don’t.  
   Would life really be simpler if I took better care of myself?  Would everything else that seems to overwhelm me be put into a different perspective?  Would I be able to deal with all the details and difficulties of daily life in a more efficient, more calm, more enjoyable manner?  
   Have I been doing it wrong all this time?  When I was pregnant, I read about a common mistake many mothers make.  They forget to take care of themselves, and in doing so, they aren’t able to care for those around them. 
   I believe in signs and the idea that things happen for a reason, if I don’t know what the reason is at the time.  Maybe someone is trying to send me a message.  I’ve got the horoscopes in front of me and a leg that is still not fully healed.  I’ve got to start taking care of myself.  Pleasing myself.  


  1. I think you are on to something and hate to tell you "I told you so". I think it's time you start taking care of yourself. Go buy some flowers, have a coffee bean, read a book, and PLEASE TAKE A BATH!!!! I hope your leg is feeling better. I love and miss you so much. Please start taking care of yourself.. it's time!

  2. You are a WONDERFUL person.You are a very giving person and people who know you are very lucky to have you in their life.I think you may have gotten putting yourself at the bottom of the list from me as that is something that I have always done and it certainly isn't a good thing.Please please start taking time for YOU.I love you and I am very proud of you.

  3. Like your Mother, you try to please everyone. This is an impossibility. You must please yourself. You are an accomplished, gifted person, who doesn't deserve the health issues, you are experiencing. Once this is behind you, Life will be better, You are loved and respected by family, friends, and colleagues. Like your Mother I am proud of you.

    Love, Dad

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  5. You're such an amazing, strong woman. I am so glad that you're my friend so that I can tell you to take time for yourself! I'll second what MB said above: Take a Bath! (lol) Don't put off til tomorrow, the pampering you can do today!

  6. Honey,

    I Love You! You have to do nice things for yourself. It recharges you to deal with the daily demands that hit us left and right everyday.

    I Love You with all of my heart!