About Me:

Aloha! I'm Wendy Kennar. I'm the mother of a seven-year-old son and a wife living in Los Angeles. I was a public school teacher for twelve years until a chronic medical condition made it necessary to leave my teaching career.

I've always been described as "quiet" - really, I'm just biting my tongue. I've got lots to say, and lots of thoughts to share, I just prefer to write them. That's the purpose of this blog. Each Wednesday, I post a personal essay offering my observations and thoughts.

A few fun facts about me: I've wanted to be a writer since second grade, when my teacher, Mrs. Jones, made me a "book" with a yellow construction paper cover. I have never learned to whistle, have always preferred sunflowers to roses, and have spent my life living within the same zip code.

Through the years, my writing has been published in the Los Angeles Times, Christian Science Monitor, United Teacher, GreenPrints, L.A. Parent, DivineCaroline.com, RoleReboot.org, XOJane, and Brain, Child Magazine. Additionally, my personal essays have been included in several anthologies, including: The Barefoot Review, Beyond the Diaper Bag, Lessons From My Parents, Write for Light, Being a Grown-Up: A User's Manual for the Real World, Ka-Pow!, How Writing Can Get You Through Tough Times, Breath and Shadow, The Grey Wolfe Storybook, and Sisters Born, Sisters Found.
I am a regular contributor at MomsLA.com, and you can also find me at Goodreads.

Thanks for stopping by and reading my blog. Feel free to comment and share my blog with others!

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Me, Naturally


   There isn’t one thing that defines me - although sometimes it feels like it.  Sometimes it feels like I am MOMMY (yes, all capitals are intended).  Every fiber of being is consumed with taking care of my son.  Other times, I have 32 students who are each demanding my attention and I am not “Wendy,” I am “Mrs. Kennar.”  When there are quiet moments to reflect on my life, I realize that I associate with different natural entities, and for different reasons.  

   Here’s my hybrid:

   Butterflies have become one of my hallmarks.  Although, I didn’t always like butterflies.  Mainly because of my dad’s mother, and here I use the term “mother” loosely.  She was biologically his mother, my grandmother, but where it counts - in actions, in love - she wasn’t.  She liked butterflies, had butterfly prints and butterfly specimens framed and adorning the walls of her house.  And if she liked them, I couldn’t, out of principle.  

   Now, I am a butterfly person.  I admire their transformative nature, the way they begin their lives as less-than-attractive caterpillars and evolve into beautiful creatures.  Butterflies appear gentle and dainty, yet they’re strong and go the distance.  I like to think that’s me.  For most of my early years, I saw myself as a caterpillar, and now I like to think I’ve evolved into a more appreciated, more respected butterfly.

   Whales are commonly referred to as “gentle giants.”  For a while, I entertained the idea of becoming a marine biologist, working at Sea World or on a ship studying and observing these phenomenal creatures.  These large animals gracefully, and seemingly effortless, glide through the water, breech and leap in exuberance.  Whales are intelligent, and respected for their intelligence.  For a while, I was embarrassed by mine.  I was tired of being the “smart girl.”  I wanted to be the pretty girl, the funny girl, the popular girl - anything but the “straight-A girl.”    Whales are who they are, and we study them and respect them for it.  Whales are also quite social, living and traveling with their family pods - a concept I don’t quite understand as the older I get the relationships with my siblings unravel.

   And then there’s the moon.  For many years, I was going to be an astronaut.  No question about it.  More specifically, I would be the first woman to walk on the moon.   The moon was mysterious and enchanting, captivating and alluring, indescribably beautiful.  People studied it, wrote poems about it, painted it.  From a distance, nothing compared to the moon.  Up close though, the moon looked like a different terrestrial body.  Pockmarks and craters interrupted the surface.  And that was my teenage face - disturbed by acne markings.  If only, someone could stand back and see I did have beauty also.  I could be appreciated for my looks.  

   Now, I’m in my mid-thirties (gasp! when did that happen?).  I am who I am.  And, I’ve got some admirable personality traits that I intend to celebrate and be proud of.

4 comments:

  1. Honey,
    Reading this blog from you reminds me of the many reasons I fell in love with you. I am so happy to see that you are starting to see the many wonderful things I see in you. Thank you for being you! I Love You!
    Paul

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  2. You are truly a REMARKABLE person.I am sorry you felt the way you did when you were younger,and I am sorry you don't have the kind of relationship you should have with your siblings(which is their loss).You are a wonderful,caring,and loving person.You are a fantastic,mommy, wife,teacher,friend and a DAUGHTER that I thank God for everyday.Never doubt yourself because anyone who has contact with you should be glad to know you.I love you and I am so proud of you.
    love,mommy

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  3. It is always difficult to value yourself. I have discovered that most people are their own worst critic. I am impressed with what you have accomplished and that you are always striving to improve yourself. You have done a remarkable job with your son. Your Mother & I are proud of you.

    Love, Dad

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  4. Wendy, I agree with your Mom. You are wonderful and I am so glad to know you and have you as a close friend. It's other's losses if they can't see what an amazing individual you are. I am loving you writing as always. And I am really appreciating the depths of your self disclosure which is a little bit new. It takes a lot of courage to share some of your stories which weren't always positive, but which have made you who you are today: A beautiful, smart, loving woman.

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